How Understanding Ourselves Helps Us Social Distance

When we hear the word "extrovert", we immediately think Kimmy Gibler from Full House. Or Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. Or Phoebe Buffay from Friends.

They're over-the-top, extremely outgoing, and could talk to anyone.

When we hear the word "introvert", we think of Belle from Beauty and the Beast. Or Bella Swan from Twilight. Or Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower.

They're shy, unexpressive and thrive when they're alone.

When we were younger, Maddie was always the outgoing extrovert and Sarah was the shy introvert. That's just how we saw ourselves and how people saw us. It wasn't until college that we realized personality isn't that simple.

Introverts may need more alone time to recharge, but that doesn't mean they despise social situations. Extroverts may feel energized from being with people, but that doesn't mean they can't enjoy a second to themselves.

Understanding our socialization needs has helped us get through the never-ending isolation that is social distancing. 

We encourage you to dive into the complexities of your personality; maybe you’ll find something that helps you get through quarantine.

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An Introverted Extrovert:

Maddie

If you met me, the last thing you would describe me as is an introvert. I've always found it easy to start conversations with strangers, make friends in uncomfortable situations and find similarities with all different kinds of people.

The reason that I decided to major in Public Relations is because I love to be social. I pride myself in being able to easily form relationships and work well in groups. There’s nothing I love more than seeing my friends and going out. Keeping in touch with old friends is something that I find myself to be really good at, when I know for most people it seems more like an annoyance. 

I went into college convinced that I'd be fine because I was an extrovert, but It wasn’t until my freshman year at USC that I found I was also a bit of an introvert. I was living in a box of a dorm room with a roommate that I hardly knew. Nothing against her, we actually became best friends, but living with another person in such close quarters was really hard for me. When I was homesick or stressed or sad or angry, I could never be by myself. This was when I realized that having alone time was unbelievably important for my mental health. 

Yes, I find it easy to become friends with people, but being alone is how I decompress. It's what gives me the energy to be social. I love to run errands alone, take drives by myself or even lock myself in my room to watch TV or read. Without enough alone time, I tend to feel tired, overwhelmed, and as Sarah likes to call it “grumpy”. 

I’ve decided to stay at school during the current pandemic, but that doesn't mean there haven't been times when quarantine has been rough. I live with 4 of my best friends and even though this seems like the perfect time to isolate myself and be alone, I find myself feeling pressured to hang out with my roommates in the living room instead of locking myself in my bedroom. I know that without living with my friends, I’d probably go insane from too much isolation, but sometimes I wish I had a little bit more. 

On the other hand, quarantine definitely has its perks for someone like me. It’s been a solid month since all of this began and I haven’t really been bored or antsy at all. Instead, I’ve felt super relaxed and refocused. I know that when social distancing ends and it’s time for me to enter a social setting again, I’ll feel so refreshed and ready that I’ll really be able to give it my all and enjoy every moment of it. 

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An Extroverted Introvert:

Sarah

When I was younger, I was always the shy friend. I met new people through friends I already had and waited for someone else to introduce me. I didn’t talk to people in class unless they turned to me first. 

I enjoyed my Saturdays when I would sit on my childhood bed and look out onto the quiet street while I watched a movie in my room. 

Then college came and I got scared. As much as I was nervous about having to find new friends on my own accord, I was more frightened by the image of me sitting alone in my dorm. So I took it upon myself to ask my randomly selected roommates if they wanted to hang out on the first weekend of school.

I still get nervous about talking to new people or going somewhere where I don’t know anyone, but I’m finding that I feel like more of an extrovert than an introvert. 

Being around people energizes me. Every weekend morning I practically jump out of bed to go discuss the previous night's chaos with my roommates. I look forward to running into people on campus. I'm hardly ever in my bedroom alone, and if I am, my door is never, ever closed.

Unfortunately, being a social butterfly has made quarantine difficult. As much as I want to be socializing with different people and going places where others are around, I can't. It's quite literally not an option.

One thing that social distancing has taught me is how to get creative with socializing in order to meet my extroverted self's needs. Zoom hangouts with different groups of friends is a must. Games that we can all play on our laptops or phones keep things interesting. Reviving old group chats that don't keep in touch anymore is exciting.

It's not exactly the type of socializing that I want, but it's what I can get and need right now.

This pandemic has shown me more than ever before that, as shy as I can be, I'm an extrovert at heart. I physically can't wait until I can be surrounded by people again.

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Although it seems like our personalities would clash, we’ve actually found that our differences allow us to gain new perspectives. Our individual extroverted and introverted traits help us come together and understand each other better in every type of social situation.